Wine, Cigars & Coaching Talk

Are you confident or just arrogant?

Jun 17 2015
By: Doron York
Categories: Just a Thought!
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One of the most controversial topics in today’s business life is the difference between Confidences and Arrogance. The reality is that people confuse confidence with arrogance and vice versa each and every day and of the week and twice on Sunday. The impact of this “Symptom” in the professional arena is the high cost of a loss of productivity, creativity and effective working relationships.

Given the fact that a large percentage of most societies consist of complacent amiable (about 65% of the US population) personality type, when they are in the presence of confident people they are being intimidated and label them as arrogant, which give them no power. I have worked with many successful business leaders and senior executives and for the most part; I find them highly confident; few of them are actually arrogant, which can be a byproduct of success, that is just life, yet I would say that the Pareto (Vilfredo Pareto) principle (80/20) will be applicable here as well.

Confidence– is generally described as a state of being certain, either, that a hypothesis or prediction is correct, or that a chosen course of action is the best or most effective. Self-confidence is having confidence in oneself.

Arrogance – Ar”ro*gance (#),  The act or habit of arrogating, or making undue claims in an overbearing manner. Pride which consists of exorbitant claims of rank, dignity, estimation, or power, or, which exalts the worth or importance of the person to an undue degree; proud contempt of others; lordliness; haughtiness; self-assumption; presumption.


  • Thinking they are always the smartest people in the room
  • Talking about things you think you know
  • They think they are never wrong
  • Tend to listen to their own voice and dismissing others
  • Always defending their points of view
  • Always have “The Answer”
  • A self-defense mechanism
  • knows no boundaries
  • Living in their own reality


  • Knowing when you are the smartest person in the room
  • Talking about thinks you actually know
  • Know and admit they are wrong with no loss of power
  • Listening to other people points of view as opportunities to learn
  • Do not have a need to prove anything to anyone.
  • Always exploring other “Answer (s)”
  • Self-expression
  • Know their own limits
  • Living in the real world

My observation is that the one creates Isolation, and the other creates assimilation.  You can look at it this way: an arrogant person lacks the self-confidence despite their success (if they had any) and a confident person, does not see the need to be arrogant about their success.

Confident people, can show up at times as authoritative, taking charge, step into the lead, especially in senior management position that can easily fall into the human trap of arrogance. The difference is that when you are listening to people as confident people, you can learn from them, when you listen to them as arrogant people, you stop listening and so the learning stops along with it.

I am not suggesting that one is better than the other, nor that one is right and the other is wrong. It just gives one a different experience of self and experience of life. It is a choice one makes in how one would like to experience life. And the choice is all yours.

So the question is again:

Are you confident or just arrogant? (You decide)

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Media Alert!

May 18 2015
By: Doron York
Categories: News
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Aril, 2015 – Doron York COE of PAAR & Co was a gust on WCXI 1160AM radio Show. Speaking on how Mentor or a Coach can help you grow your business.

Ike Engelbaum – the host invite Doron York to share his business experience to help others

 “It is my pleasure to share my experience and my limited wisdom to help other business owners to be successful,” said Doron York, CEO, PAAR & Co. “I enjoy Ike positive outlook on life, it is inspiring.”

For more information, please contact our marketing department at 248.266.3664 Ext. 101 or via e-mail at

For more information about PAAR & Co services, please visit


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New Client Announcement!

Jan 30 2015
By: Doron York
Categories: News
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beetJanuary 1st 2015 – beet analytic system ( a leading technology company in the production lines’ automation space headquartered in Plymouth MI, hired PAAR Coaching and company to support the management in preparing and conditioning of the company for an explosive growth potential within 24 months.

The engagement is scheduled for the course of 2015 and beyond. The engagement includes building the company’s management team and coaching its first-time CEO in creating his leadership presence.

“It is an honor that they consider PAAR Coaching as the coaching firm to hire. It is a testament that our work speaks for itself. We are excited about this opportunity to work with a growing Michigan company. “ – Doron York PAAR CEO and Senior Executive Coach

For more information about PAAR Coaching, please visit us online at or call 248.266.3664 Ext. 101.

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Intensity and Stress – is it a love story?

Oct 27 2014
By: Doron York
Categories: White Papers
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Intensity and Stress – is it a love story?

I have observed many of my clients and discovered how easy it is to confuse the two. Most people who work in intense environments often take on the “explanation”, a temporary point of view that intensity is “highly stressful”.  This causes them to experience disempowerment in its various levels, personally and professionally.  That “explanation”, temporary point of view, gives one a particular experience of life in the moment which is not that inspiring.  This has the everyday reality arise in a particular way, mostly annoyance and irritation which have people being annoyed and irritated and makes them temporarily and mentally unavailable.

One can say that Intensity is ‘in the moment’ experience which manifests itself in the physical domain, i.e. distance, time and form – the ultimate test of reality. Stress, however, exists in the emotional, mental and intellectual domain – an interpretation – not real. I say that stress is a human invented interpretation as a survival mechanism designed to “label” the experience such that you would act (automatically) in direct correlation to that experience. This view point: “it is stressful” intends to provide an explanation(s) for one’s ability or inability to powerfully deal with their circumstances.

So the question is:  How come two or more individuals who operate in the same level of intensity, in the same exact environment have different interpretations and therefore have a completely different experience and reactions to it?

Just to illustrate, watch the video:

Example: One of my closest friends is an F-16 pilot.  In conversations I have had with him over the years, I have learned that most pilots during operational flights are in a highly Intense environment, most people would agree. That intense environment is being manifested in various physical sensations such as heat, cold, G-force (pressure), air fluctuations etc.… Which for the common man (you and I) it looks extremely stressful and impossible to function if at all. For the trained pilot there is no experience of stress at all. For them to fly the jet is like for most of us is to make a cup of coffee or turning on the TV. How come?

My observation leads me to the conclusion that the pilot was trained to be present – right here – right now. They are (their brain) trained to suspend and/or not take the interpretation of “it is stressful”.  The pilot’s actions are appropriate and correlated to flying the Jet instead of dealing with their emotions, mental and/or intellectual conversation (an explanation of) which has nothing to do with the moment, right now, right here. An intensity which is real vs. Stress which is not real, after all it is just an interpretation inside a human invented conversation mode. As we have said many times that for humans, perception is reality (at least for most of us).

Saying it another way, F-16 pilots train their brains that stress is unreal and inappropriate, i.e. not an effective interpretation of the experience of intensity and/or operating in an intense environment.

Why is this conversation so critical to the world of management?

In my professional opinion, today’s world of most senior managers, corporate executives and business leaders are very similar to that of the F-16 pilot seating in the cockpit. The volume, complexity and speed of the world around them are increasing in rapid pace – i.e. highly intense. Yet, their human operating system (their brain) has not caught up fast enough and before they know it, they can find themselves in vertigo or in a G-Wash situation very quickly. In the professional environment, it means losing their job, being demoted and/or ending a career.

So what do we do with this conversation?

I have created a few power tips that will provide you with a guide to start developing prowess and best practices to overcome this paradigm.

  • Know and train your brain that the reality, and your experience of reality are two different occurrences altogether. Doing your job and your experience of doing your job, are two distinct conversations.
  • Look at things the way they are. Do not add anything or subtract anything, exactly the way it is and way that it is not. (The sky is blue, the grass is green and you are 6.1” high.
  • Notice, if you get emotional (frustrations, anger, resentments, etc…) consider that at that moment, temporarily, you disconnected yourself from reality (went away); you are now in the “Stress Zone”. Get back!
  • If the desired results and/or outcomes in any given moment are not correlated to your intentions and actions, stop! – Apply the 60 second rule, step back, and get yourself centered. Evaluate the facts and information you have and then, refocus and committedly re-engaged.
  • Nothing is wrong! – Things are the way that they are and the way that they are not, you do not have to like it, agree with it, believe in it or stand for it. You just need to get, it is just the way that it is.
  • You are human after all and this conversation is counterproductive to our fundamental design. It will take a lifetime of training and practice to get good at it. The moment you stop training yourself it will go away, disappear and you are back to the downward spiral very fast.

You can use these guidelines to start to develop your own toolbox of best practices that work for you. There is no ‘one size fits all’ solution, we are different DNA’s. What works for one does not necessarily work for another. Be creative.

So, are you stressed now or just intense?

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News Release!

Mar 01 2014
By: Doron York
Categories: News
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Jewish Vocational Services -JVS headquartered in Southfield, hosted The Anatomy of Success presentation given by Doron York, CEO and Chief Coaching Officer of PAAR & Company to various business owners from the Metro Detroit area.

 JVS 2“Doron provided the kick-off presentation for the JVS 2014 Business Connection series.  In his 45-minute presentation on The Anatomy of Success, he not only enlightened the audience; he also inspired us to harness our own success.  Doron’s relaxed style allowed him to connect with the audience and deliver his message in a practical format.  The most impressive aspect of his presentation was that the information shared was gathered through Doron’s personal research.  This not only allows for an interesting presentation, but it also builds credibility.  I am looking forward to collaborating with Doron in the future.” – Liz Rivard,– Employment Specialist at JVS.”

For more information about scheduling a speaking engagements, please contact our marketing department at 248.266.3664 Ext. 101 or via e-mail at

For more information about PAAR & Co services, please visit


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Upcoming Events! – The Anatomy of Success

Jan 28 2014
By: Doron York
Categories: News
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The Anatomy of Success!

Join us for this dynamic workshop to obtain a meaningful and actionable way to define and achieve your own success. Discover the structure of a “success mindset” its progression process and how highly successful people relate to the success and failure dynamics.

Presented by Doron York, the founder and CEO of PAAR Coaching. With his 20 years of successful entrepreneurial career as well as coaching hundreds of other business leaders, develop ordinary people to extraordinary high performers.

February 25, 2014 7:30am – 9:00am – FREE

For more info or to register, please contact Liz Rivard at or (248) 233.4481




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If it isn’t broken, fix it!

Jun 13 2013
By: Doron York
Categories: Coaching Talk
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One of the most obvious observations I have made in the last ten years, and more significantly during the recent crisis, is that nothing is constant. Many corporations were caught unprepared to deal with the sharp changes in the market place.

For many, many years the approach “if it’s not broken, don’t fix” was a leading approach in the business world. I say on the contrary, in today’s world the more appropriate approach should be “If it isn’t broken, do fix it” is more apropos than ever.

Complacency is the prime “killer” of innovation, progression and organizations ability to move forward. It has also been said before that “if you do not move forward, you are moving backwards” I believe that is even more accurate to say today. “If you do not move forward, you move out”. (Out of business that is).

In the fast pace of today’s business world, you are as good as yesterday results. The ability of any organization to bank on their success, in a matter of quarters, weeks, or in some cases, days is now inconceivable.  It is OK to “feel” comfortable and or celebrate your successes for a moment, yet do not let it getting to your head too much, as your competitors  are already strategizing on how to beat you in your own game.

They are using the same channels of outreach, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and such others and they are talking to your customers as well, uncovering and capitalizing on your company’s weaknesses sometimes before even you do.

I have discussed this with an executive in a fortune 100 company; he describes this phenomenon as being fearful and in the same time discourages developing “paranoia”.  As I have described to you about my  SEAL training, the ability to be intense and relaxed in the same time is the key. Do not loss you edge and never panic.

Here is the bottom line: In today’s marketplace, complacency is a death warrant!


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Management Team Coaching

Feb 14 2013
By: Doron York
Categories: Case Studies
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CS No. 030912 – dSPACE Inc. / Advance Electronic Technology & Engineering Services A 18 year old German-owned US subsidiary located in Wixom, MI.

The Engagement

The engagement was divided into the following objectives:

  • To assess the current management talent and assist the current President  with the company leadership development
  • To assist the senior management team in redesigning the company to accommodate the market demands
  • To coach the Director of Engineering in creating a new management team and redesigning the operation workflow

The Company Profile

The business unit was operating for 12-15 years as a sales organization for the parent company in Germany. The company has been operating with a very lean management structure in a directive and controlled environment.  Despite the economic crises the company experienced rapid growth which forced the management team to undertake the restructuring effort.

The challenges:

  • To move away from the controlled environment to a more open and engaging workflow.
  • How to create independent operations and maintain a consistent representation of the parent company’s brand in the US.
  • Align on a strategic plan that will give the company the competitive advantage it needs to breakthrough to the next level of performance.
  • To transform the chaos in the operations and production to a more stable and organized environment.
  • The stress level in operations especially in the Q4 of each year was very high, resulted in high employees’ turnover and difficulties in maintaining the necessary talent.

The Results!

After 18 months of coaching we produced some remarkable breakthroughs towards the company’s future:

  • The company established a senior management team with a clear vision.
  • For the first time the company has undertaken creating a strategic business plan in collaboration with, and input of all members of the management team.
  • The Engineering and Production Department is now organized with a management team of 7 who are responsible for all aspects of the business operations and production.
  • Despite the economic crises and through the corporate restructuring process the company maintained a consistent book of business with small increases in volume.
  • The stress level in operation is reduced dramatically.
  • The company is on track to noticeably exceed the last two years of booking.

It is what the clients say that counts:

“I met Doron York, founder and CEO of PAAR & Company (Former Business Edge International) after hearing his presentation at a MSED meeting mid-year. We started an engagement with Doron about October of last year. Since then he has conducted periodic coaching sessions with me as well as with a handful of my staff. The sessions have been both one on one and in groups. The improvement in the energy and ownership displayed by my staff has been remarkable. This has been one of the wiser investments that I have made for dSPACE.”

Kevin Kott – President dSPACE Inc.

The R.O.C

After 18 months into the engagement, the company currently evaluates the R.O.C at minimum of 6 times! (600%)

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“Insights” junkies’ nation

Nov 13 2012
By: Doron York
Categories: Business Ideas
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Recently I had an epiphany during one of my coaching sessions with one of my clients. I have discovered that we, as human beings are what I call “Insight” junkies. There is a distinct difference between an In-Sight and a Break-Through.

I have noticed that people often say during a self-discovery process: “I had a breakthrough”, which I now see that they meant I had an “Insight” and that is not clearly distinguished for most.

Let me offer my limited wisdom:

I define an “In-Sight”–as a result of self-examination that is located in temporality, like random thoughts that impact nothing. Like a revelation or an Ahhaaa..moment. You can say that insight happens by default out of a self-discovery process and does not require much effort, at least in most cases. It is unconscious activity. It happens in an indirect way, an unexpected turn or my favorite: a day dream.


A “Break-Through” – happens when an “In-Sight” is translated into actions and outcomes which ultimately causes an alteration of one’s way of operating in life in distinct, visible, noticeable and measurable ways. It is a conscious and intentional effort that requires work, i.e. actions and activities that are directed in a specific direction, a guided process inside a particular time frame.

Saying it another way, translating your “In-Sight” into action(s) creates the possibility of a “Break-Through”. Being in a State of “Break-Through” is a result or an outcome of the sum of the work that is being done in translating an “In-Sight” into reality.

An “In-sight” is no more than a memory we have. Although there is nothing wrong with having insights, it is the first state of any self-discovery process and its usefulness will be realized only if, and when, it is being used to produce a “Break-Through”.

So what do you do from here?

  • Stop dreaming and start acting.
  • Open your Insight Inventory™ and decide which of them you would like to turn into a “Break-Through”.
  • Define how it looks when it is done and complete.
  • Create the action items.
  • Put them in your Time Bank.
  • Get to work.

It is that simple. As long as you are clear that they are not the same, you will have the freedom to direct your life resources towards the future you need, desire or want to fulfill and to do it powerfully.

What breakthroughs are you up to?

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New Client Announcement!

Nov 12 2012
By: Doron York
Categories: News
No Comments

A Venture Capital firm headquartered in Detroit MI hires PAAR & Company to coach its managing partners and senior executives.

The engagement consists of coaching the managing partners and senior executives in developing their leadership DNA in order to increase the firm’s footprint in the market place.

 “It is a very unique opportunity,” said Doron York, CEO, PAAR & Co. “we are extremely privileged to have such a firm recognize our reputation, accomplishments and brand. We are delighted that they are willing to trust us with their company’s leadership.”

For more information, please contact our marketing department at 248.838.3073 Ext. 701 or via e-mail at

For more information about PAAR & Co services, please visit


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  • About The Company
    PAAR & Company is a global enterprise that specializes in the impossible. We are in the business of coaching corporate leaders in advancing forward those areas that are making an immediate, relevant and positive impact on their leadership presence and that are highly critical to the sustainability of their enterprise.